PCTC’s This Week in GOP Insanity

How to make a Political Party Extinct in 30 years or less!

by @sueinrockville and Milt Shook

GOP VisionThis was truly a banner week for the GOP course of self-destruction notably among the three remaining GOP Presidential Contenders.

Where else to begin but with Donald J. Drumpf who is having another terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week, where he apparently suggested digging up the late Joe Paterno.  His campaign’s clumsy attempts to explain he meant the Paterno Statue did very little to convince anyone.

Of course, if Drumpf’s ignorance about national issues wasn’t fodder enough for all the late-night comedy shows, he wasn’t finished and he proceeded to dip his tiny little toe into the very complex issue of Israel and the disputed territories. Predictably, he was unable to answer a single question, but instead tossed it over to his “Jewish” advisor.

Speaking of Jewish gaffes-the irrelevant John Kasich, who is only different from Drumpf and Cruz because he doesn’t scream in profanities, is praying for a miracle this Passover, although he’s likely to miss out.

As Kasich clumsily tried to #Goysplain Passover to a group of Orthodox Jews. In the process, he conflated events that occurred thousands of years apart. He tried to link the fact that Jesus was called the “Lamb of God” to the lamb’s blood smeared over the doors of the homes of Jews before the killing of their first-born sons.

Apparently, Ted Cruz is not satisfied being despised by 90% of Americans, most of them fellow Republicans. He decided that he would rather go for a perfect score, so, in a nausea-inducing series of events, he proceeded to explain & justify banning  masturbation and dildos.

However, the best tweet of the week may have been from his former college roommate, Craig Mazin, who may still suffer from PTSD. He said,

Mind bleach is on the way.

Cruz familyNot enough Cruz? How about this; Heidi Cruz admitted at a CNN Townhall that, upon returning from their honeymoon, Cruz went to the store & returned with 100 cans of Chunky Soup!  Yet she is still married to him.   At least it wasn’t apple pies I guess!  ( See 1999 film American Pie)

Okay, one more, but we’ll trade out the mind bleach for a barf bag. Cruz did a Town Hall on CNN earlier this week with his daughters and Heidi, where he admitted that, on a daddy-daughter outing, he allowed his daughter to dress him in women’s underwear and a pink boa. He was shocked, however, when his daughter advised him that there was video of the event out there somewhere. Are you like us, and both wishing you could see it and hoping you don’t?

caribouBarbie 2We thought we were done but that pesky barnacle Sarah Palin (known around these parts as Caribou Barbie!) rounds out the week by claiming that “Bill Nye is as much a scientist as (she is).” Okay, Barbie, let’s compare and contrast:

Bill Nye the Science Guy

Caribou Barbie

The only thing she is an expert in is speaking Authentic Frontier Gibberish.

Come back next week as we explore GOP Governors and their failures to learn the Laws of Unintended Consequences!

Congress
The Health Insurance Follies: Fight Graham-Cassidy NOW!

There are currently two competing healthcare bills in Congress. They represent both extremes of the healthcare financing debate, which is what this is all about, after all. Both are ill-conceived, but for very different reasons. The first one is Bernie Sanders’ Medicare-for-All single-payer bill. That is ill-conceived because the timing …

Crap Cutting 101
11
Why Churches Should Pay Taxes

Last night, Lord Donny posted the following Tweet: Churches in Texas should be entitled to reimbursement from FEMA Relief Funds for helping victims of Hurricane Harvey (just like others). — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) September 9, 2017 As you can probably imagine, the responses from his closest followers was overwhelmingly …

Crap Cutting 101
4
Why Republicans Lie About the Debt Ceiling

As anyone who has read this blog on a regular basis knows, I am in no way a “Chicken Little” liberal. I tend to be what Stephanie Miller refers to as a. “Happy Clappy” liberal because I tend to take a bit of an optimistic outlook on most things and …

%d bloggers like this: